Beautiful ending

I should be going to bed now that I have just completed another assignment for school, but instead I am checking up on my favorite patients through their websites and came across something I had to share. I have mentioned Kate before (see "Kate the Great" on the right hand side of our blog page), but not sure if I said that Kate had a sister named Caroline. Caroline was born with the same disease as Kate, but developed symptoms of the disease too quickly to attempt treatment. Caroline recently passed away at the age of 9 and her mom Allison wrote the most beautiful description of Caroline's passing. We hear about our patients dying, but often do not know the specific circumstances surrounding their deaths or what it was like for the parents to say goodbye. I just had to share from Kate's webpage the description of the Kirk's experience. It truly was a beautiful ending.

This option is not feasible or desirable for everyone, but we also found it a great comfort to keep Caroline at home after her death. We had cared for her so constantly through her life that it was hard for us to think about other people caring for her after she died. We found a compassionate and knowledgeable funeral director, Jim Brewer at Marshall-Donnelly-Combs, who basically said that he would help us attend to Caroline after her death in whatever manner we desired. He and his co-workers Katherine and Billy were in our house frequently over the next couple of days, at any hour of the day or night we needed them. After Caroline died my sisters, Doug, and I washed her body and her hair. We dressed her and placed her on the bed in her room. My sister’s friend Betty sent a gorgeous white dress, actually a first communion dress, for Caroline to wear. I told Caroline that if she knew what a froufrou outfit I had her in she’d be giving me the business. We compromised in that I let her stay barefoot under her big skirt. The girl never liked shoes. We put two small ice packs wrapped in towels on either side of her torso, and changed these maybe every twelve hours. There were a few changes in Caroline’s body over the next two days, not many, and they served to remind us that this was only her body, that her spirit had been released. Everyone had time to sit with her, read to her, talk to her over the next couple of days. I frequently found myself running into her room to tell her what I was doing, and it felt so natural. On the morning of her burial Doug carried her down the stairs and we placed her in her casket in our foyer. She was to be covered with a quilt which my sisters and I made with our mother as she was dying of cancer. My sisters tucked this around Caroline as if they were tucking her in for the night. We placed a few mementos in her casket and then closed it. Doug and I and other family members carried the casket from our porch to the hearse, and then from the hearse to the gravesite for the burial. At the burial Dahl read one of Caroline’s favorite books, The Circle of Days, Aunt Julie spoke, and Doug sang to Caroline one more time.

Hallow-Eno

We have had a great month...fun activities and finally Fall-like weather! I am posting some of my favorite October pictures (in addition to the Halloween slideshow above) and you can click HERE if you want to see the entire October collection of photos on Kodak Gallery. Happy November everybody!

Elias relaxing at Grandma's house

an afternoon at Hill Ridge Farms

5 year anniversary date

Love is something that we do

Today marks 1,825 days since Christopher and I started our lives together. What a beautiful day it was...a big white barn, the colors of fall all around and love in the air. We cried (everyone did!), said vows and danced and celebrated until dark. It was the best day of my life, second only to the birth of our little buddy.

We had our good friend, Nick Cheek, sing a song whose words mean even more to me today than they did then. I have always loved the song because I feel like it describes love as an action, rather than a warm fuzzy feeling. Warm, fuzzy feelings are wonderful and we still feel them (going on cruises, just the two of us REALLY helps!), but day to day, love is something that we DO. Here are the words to the song by Clint Black.

I remember well the day we wed

I can see that picture in my head

I still believe the words we said

Forever will ring true

Love is certain, love is kind

Love is yours and love is mine

But it isn't something that we find

It's something that we do

It's holding tight, lettin' go

It's flying high and laying low

Let your strongest feelings show

And your weakness, too

It's a little and a lot to ask

An endless and a welcome task

Love isn't something that we have

It's something that we do

We help to make each other all that we can be

Though we can find our strength and inspiration independentlyT

he way we work together is what sets our love apart

So closely that you can't tell where I end and where you start

It gives me heart remembering how

We started with a simple vow

There's so much to look back on now

Still it feels brand-new

We're on a road that has no end

And each day we begin again

Love's not just something that we're in

It's something that we do

We help to make each other all that we can be

Though we can find our strength and inspiration independently

The way we work together is what sets our love apart

So closely that you can't tell where I end and where you start

Love is wide, love is long

Love is deep and love is strong

Love is why I love this song

And I hope you love it too

I remember well the day we wed

I can see that picture in my head

Love isn't just those words we said

It's something that we do

There's no request too big or small

We give ourselves, we give our all

Love isn't someplace that we fall

It's something that we do

Happy five years to my best friend, my lover, my rock. I love you more with every passing year and also look forward to our 5-0 party! Everyone mark your calendars for October 26, 2052!